Monday, 21 September 2009
Saturday, 19 September 2009
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Shattered.
I miss your voice...I miss your touch...I miss you so much. I can't go an hour in each day without thinking about you and how we were. I hate the thought of her holding your hand, the hands that used to keep me safe. I hate the thought of her kissing those lips. The lips that used to kiss me so sweetly. I miss laying on your chest and rubbing my fingers across your collar bones, and tracing the contours of your beautiful face. I have every curve, every freckle, every detail of your face memorized. I can close my eyes and think of you and it's like you are really standing infront of me. I miss how you would pick me up and I'd wrap my legs around your waist, and we would just sway back and forth. I miss slow dancing in your room. I don't know how to do this...This life, without you. "You said move on, where do I go?"
Thursday, 17 September 2009
Wednesday, 16 September 2009
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A ramble.
So this is day one after saying goodbye to her. I started off nervous, then I got really sad, then I thought I was okay, and now, I am just angry. I love her so much and I'm not sure how to do this. Let her go? I know it is what she wants me to do so that is what is going to keep me going. How can I hang on to someone that doesn't want me to? I know I can get through this but it's going to take me a long while. On a brighter note, I am going to Pride! It is this sunday and I absolutely cannot wait. It will be a nice distraction. I told myself that I'm taking myself out of the dating game. I don't want to date anyone. I don't see me wanting anyone. Unless someone completely takes my breath away. Not by looks. But with chemistry. I have only felt that connection once, and as we see...I ruined that. So unless someone can just walk up and make me forget to breath...I am sorry but it's not worth my time. I can usually tell a lot about a girl by the first couple sentences out of their mouths. If they start out by telling me how hot I am, it's a definite no go. At least ask me what my name is before you ask for my number! I refuse to seek out that person. If it happens, it happens. If not, it just means keep waiting. I am okay with that. The weather here in Texas is so nice right now. It's been overcast for like a week! I don't really like the sun too much so this is amazing. I can feel fall sneeking in...I love the fall. I think of fall and winter as when the old dies and spring and summer as new beginnings. New life. I love watching each season come and go. Fall makes me want to walk in the park and feel the wind on my face, and smell the faint smell of fireplaces...Yes, here in Texas, we get a lil carried away when it starts to get cold lol. I love it. Wow I have completely just rambled. I want to smile.
